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Hustler opened a strip club in New York City. Around 3 am me and a freind were driving around and had nothing to do so we went there. It was my first time there. I was way way passed intoxicated when I got there. Alot of chicks and a nice looking place. Had a few lapdances and went to eat.
Pic from cl-erotica.com
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Here is my problem, Im horny as a fucking convict straight out of prison and my only girl i have at the moment it a cute fat chick. She is cute but she is fat. Im almost considering it because that is how bad i need pussy. I fucked a fat girl once and had nightmares afterwards. So Im really leaning toward not doing it. I dont know if I can last another day with out busting a nut on a female. So Guys what would you do? I know you would bang her because thats what us guys do. I could wait a few days for one of my regular bitches to come around but im inpatient. Well see what happen.
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Today is all about getting a blowjob. I will be stuffing some girls mouth later in the day as well so guy and ladies read up. Below is the list of 10 worst blowjob mistakes. Guy show your girls this because if they are doin something wrong let them know. Ladies take my advice and read this, email me also if you need a new cock to suck, Im available daily between the hours of 9 am to 9 am. (get it) Back to your mouth, proper technique is essential and if you know what not to do you give better head.
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Females do not attempt this at home unless your a pro whore and dont tell your boyfreinds.
10 worst blowjob mistakes
1. The number one blowjob mistake: letting your teeth hit his cock. We can’t stress this enough. Ask any guy and he’ll tell you again and again: nothing is worse than a blowjob that is “all teethâ€. In fact, most guys won’t admit it, but their idea of a perfect blowjob would be getting sucked off by a gorgeous woman with removable dentures. Teeth can nick and scrape the sensitive skin of the penis. Open your mouth wide enough that they stay away from his cock, or suck your lips in over them to cushion the rough edges. If he’s wearing a condom during the blowjob this may provide a slight buffer, but don’t count on it.
2. Going too fast
Some guys enjoy a quickie, but unless they’re in a hurry to get back to work or back to their wife/girlfriend, most men like to savor the experience of getting their cock sucked. So don’t rush them. It’s not a race to see how fast you can get him to spurt. Take your time and make it last. Concentrate on different parts of his penis, or his balls, then go back to basic sucking and stroking. At the end of a luxuriant BJ session, he’ll blow a much larger, more satisfying load.
3. Sucking too hard
Hoovering him like a dustbuster may seem like a good idea in theory, but there’s a wrong way to do it. Don’t fasten your mouth around the head of his cock and suck like you’re trying to get a triple-thick milkshake though a straw. Guys’ dickheads are the most sensitive part of the penis, and uncut guys are even more sensitive there. The proper technique to hoover is to take more of his cock into your mouth and apply moderate suction.
4. Crushing his nuts
Don’t grab his balls and squeeze like you’re trying to crack walnuts. This is a move you want to pull on a would-be rapist, not a guy you’re trying to get off. It’s painful. Many guys like to have their sack rubbed, licked, or gently tugged during a bj. You can even take a break from sucking his cock to take one or both of his balls into your mouth. But don’t yank on the family jewels, and don’t put them in a vise grip.
5. Barfing and gagging
Throwing up while giving a bj is definitely a turn-off, although sometimes this happens to the most well-intentioned cocksuckers. What happens is they get overenthusiastic, take the cock too deep or hard into their throat, the gag reflex gets triggered, and then it’s all over. Or once the cum starts hitting the back of her throat, things start flowing the wrong way. Don’t try to deep throat on your first BJ. Everyone will be sorry. Practice first on dildos to get your gag-reflex under control. Or just work up to it at your own speed.
6. Remaining immobile
Putting his cock in your mouth and then doing nothing is as bad as overdoing it. Most guys don’t want to feel like they’re face-fucking a cadaver. You need to work it at least a little. A total lack of effort or enthusiasm on your part is a real buzz kill. If you don’t know what to do with your tongue, at least bob your head. After a while, he may want to take a more active role and have you relax while he fucks your mouth, but you need to give him a little encouragement to get him aroused.
7. Not using enough pressure
Wimpy blowjobs are no fun. Be firm and suck him like you mean it. Lapping his dick lightly will just make him feel teased. Licking his dick like it’s a lollipop or popsicle may be fun to get warmed up, but then you have to get down to business. Use a firm (but not too firm) hand to work the shaft of his cock, while you get your mouth all over his knob and caress it with your tongue.
8. Spitting
Most guys want you to swallow and think that a BJ really isn’t complete until his load goes down your throat. The only exception is if he gets off more on spraying it on your face, tits, or somewhere else. If you really don’t want to swallow, this can be an acceptable compromise. Symbolically, swallowing shows that you accept him and his manly essence fully. Although we can’t endorse unprotected bodily fluid exchange in any form, if you happen to be giving an unprotected blowjob (i.e., without a condom) and you end up with his spunk in your mouth, do not retch his cum into a wastebasket in front of him. If you really feel you must spit, do it discreetly into a towel or tissue.
9. Dry mouth
A good BJ involves a lot of saliva. Don’t be afraid to get a little sloppy and drool on his cock. If your mouth is dry from nervousness or whatever, there will be too much friction and stickiness to give good head. If your mouth is dry, drink some water and rinse. Try to work up a good mouthful of spit before you go down. Suck on a hard candy to get your juice flowing, or suck on an Altoid to give him a mentholated BJ.
10. Stranglehold
Don’t put his cock in a death grip. It’s fine to wrap a hand around the shaft, but don’t clench and for god’s sake, watch the nails. Just hold it enough to keep it from flopping around and shuck his pole with your hand while you work him with your mouth. His dick shouldn’t have a hand print on it when you’re done.
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Heres something I came across today which is pretty funny.
It reads like a true story…
Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, went to a nearby
supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her
sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed,
with both hands behind the back of her head.
One customer who had been
at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to her car. He
noticed that Linda’s eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He
asked her if she was okay. Linda replied that she’d been shot in the
back of the head during a drive by shooting, and had been holding her
brains in for over an hour.
The man called the paramedics, who broke
into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove
her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda
had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit
canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded
like a gun shot and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head.
When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and
thought it was her brains. She had initially passed out, but quickly
re-covered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until
someone noticed and came to her aid.
And yes, Linda is a blonde.
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I always wanted to fuck a cheerleader but have never gotten the chance. This is the reason. They know how to strech it out if you know what i mean.
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Im wondering who is reading my nonsense and if you anonymous users like my sex blog. it kind of hard for me to tell. I think people like pictures more so from now on i will add more pictures. Fuck a ho. Fuck a bitch. Fuck a pussy. Fuck fuck fuck. I need a whore to fuck.
Pamala anderson is still my favorite female of all time. Yes she is the finest specimen to walk this round planet. Can you guess who my favorite porn star is. I have 2 a vintage one and a modern day one. I’ll get some pics soon. Just check out Pam baby.
